Wed, 14 Apr, 2021

Loneliness And The Moon

By Sweekriti Gautam

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My dad never made me feel unsatisfied. He always fulfilled my demands and gave me all that I asked for as long as I remember. But he also made me a strong girl who could fight alone with the whole world. My office is situated in one of the top building in New York City. I used to stand near the glass windows and look at the busy streets, the people and vehicles passing by the road. Thousands of thoughts used to cross my minds those days. The whole world used to say that I had got everything that a girl needed to be happy. But on those days, I could only feel empty inside.

Today was one of those days. As I closed my eyes I got a glimpse of faded memories. People say that time fade away but the memories remain deep inside the heart.  When I think about my past life, my eyes get flooded with tears. My life has changed so much. I first met Rafe seven years back in my office when he had come there for a business conference. He had asked me to marry him and I told him that I was not ready to get married but fate took us somewhere else. We got married and we had been together for seven years. He used to say that it was love at the first sight. He said that until the day before he left me forever. When I feel lonely deep inside I go to the balcony to take a deep breath. As the cold wind blows I wrap my arms around me and hug myself.  I look at the moon and compare it with my loneliness. I feel pity over the moon as it looks so lonely in the dark sky. The moon had been there with all my life. Rafe had told me, "If you ever miss me, just look at the moon and you will find me."

The moon had been with me all the time. It had seen me fighting for my own identity, supported me when I felt alone and lifted me up when I was blue. Rafe had broken my ability to trust and in that process, he had also broken me. Because I couldn’t trust anyone, I could not care for others and I had no one to care for me. When I was a little girl, I dreamed of becoming a strong and independent women. But, today I have money, name and fame but still I am not satisfied and I have come to realize that money is not everything. Today I feel empty inside  because I don't have the love of my life with me. I must assure that love is life and not money. I gaze at the moon every evening. When the cold wind blows I again return back to my present and move towards my desk with all the pending work to clear my thoughts.